This last couple of weeks felt a whole chapter all on its own. I am ready for a very slow and drowsy weekend, but I know that is not going to happen. I am planning now already for that one day in the spring holiday where we are all in our pj’s for the whole day and just watching tv, eating junk and keeping the doors and windows closed, like no one is at home.
I don’t know about you guys but some weeks just seem like they are straight from the underworld. At the end of it all, all you want to do is slump down on the nearest flat surface and just stay, unmoving and staring into space, not using any brain power at all. Those moments would be great, but it has no real time or place in an active busy household where you have to keep on top of things or else everything just ends up in a jumble.
Finding time for yourself is not really on the top of the priority list, well I find that I don’t really have the luxury of having much ‘me’ time. There is just too much to do. The weekends general consist of getting the homework or studying done, driving the children around to and from friends, or we find ourselves racing off to the shops or to friends for a braai.
The time I use to have, that once a month salon morning where you get your hair done and then a mani/pedi just does not seem to exist anymore. That one morning a month where you can just sit and let someone pamper you, a break from the everyday rush and routine of being mommy. I sit and think about it when I whip out my box colour or try and contort myself so I can do my own pedi. It was easier when I was younger too, it wasn’t such a moan and groan to get my pedi done myself, flexibility fades the older you get. Unless of course you have time for your weekly yoga sessions. (There it is again the time thing)
And then I put my monsters to bed, after a particularly difficult parenting day, and all of a sudden it all makes sense. The worlds worries that sit on your shoulders, their world worries. Knowing that you are shaping them and offering everything you can so they in turn can go out into the world and make their dreams come true, so that they can one day give their all to their children.
It is an ongoing job, it never stops, but it also never stops giving rewards, normally when you least expect it. It is by far one of the most challenging things I have ever done, but also one of the most rewarding.
Looking at the happiness when you join your child for one of their events. I resently went with my daughter to ballet. Yes, ballet. It was for mothersday. It was so sweet to see my girli do all the fancy stuff, and then it was very funny and commical to see her mother (me) trying to be this poised graceful lady. I was doing my very best to try and at least seem graceful and a bit coordinated, but sadly, no actually funnily I reminded myself of one of those Disney Hippo Ballerinas, the only difference was that they could actually dance, me, not so much.
None of that however seemed to trouble my daughter, she loved having me there, and I loved being able to be there with her. It was yet another wonderful memory that will bring back many giggles and happiness.
I am not laughing right now because my leg muscles are sore, and it is making me waddle up and down stairs. A loving reminder of a Sunday afternoon and the fact that I REALY need to start finding time to do some training again.
After ballet that afternoon, we all got home and was in great spirits, ready to get stuck into the ‘grown-up’ mac n cheese I had prepared earlier in the day.
We all have tough and rough days, where it seems like the world is on our shoulders and the rest of the solar system is jumping on too. The important thing, I think is to acknowledge that it is a bad day, knowing that it is alright and that everyone has a bad day. Don’t judge yourself for feeling run down or tired, it is normal. Then go find your man (partner), your pilar, your rock to take you in his arm and make it all seem better with a great big hug. It does not take it away, but it gives peace knowing that you are not alone and that you have someone to carry the burden with you. That is what make it feel better too, knowing you have a partner in life, in love and they have you too.
I also have a great blessing in my children, because as much as they can drive me ditsy somedays, they too can be so kind and thoughful. I find that the hugs that they give are rewarding and a great comfort too.
We all have bad days, its alright, so don’t beat youself up about it, and don’t let anyone else beat you up about it either, because I guarentee you that they have bad days too, they are just not honest and brave enough to admit it.
Keep safe, sane and well all.